Weird Britain, weird me.

Well I've arrived, back in my own country, as a foreigner.

Well not quite - I did use the 'UK and other EU countries' entrance counter at Heathrow, and no-one stopped me. But in my sister's Surrey village, I feel rather like I'm on a movie set. My sister's house seems to have gained in beauty and comfort in my eyes since I last stayed. So do all the other houses nearby that I've seen. Even the local graveyard looks huge and beautiful, and the grave stones seem so short! (In Japan they're narrow and tall.) I'm observing British landscape and British people as a Japanese tourist might, and not just any faceless Japanese tourist, but my friends whose faces and names I know so well.

So here's some other amusing things...

Eastenders was just on, and there was a girl reading out a Bible reading - again not something you'd see on japanese soap!

This morning we went out for coffee with one of Soph's old colleagues. I was entranced by all the beautiful blond children in the gorgeous coffee shop - I thought the only beautiful blond children in the world were the Wilson children - now I see many other lookalike 'missionary kids' who wouldn't even know what the term meant!

I am enjoying myself, eager for phone calls from friends. finding it strange not to have my own mobile phone so I can't call anyone yet. But the good thing is my future mother-in-law sent me a little present, and it's just what I needed - a watch! So I won't need to ask my mum what I almost asked her on the phone earlier - 'So what time is it with you?' I just need to check my watch! (I think I'll leave my computer clock on Japanese time for the time being though!)

Oh... and about my last blog entry, in case you're wondering - yes within three hours of arriving my sister told me I was speaking weird ;-) (but actually I didn't mind a bit.)

Scared of coming home

It's my last full day in Kyoto. From here, I stay with friends at our headquarters, and then fly back to England. I am feeling sad today, and a bit scared of coming home, and want to express some of why I think that is.

I love being here. I feel sad to leave my friends' lives for the length of time I will be away - likely one-and-a-half years. Maybe they won't even be living in this region when I come back - so this life as I know it is soon gone. I also feel sad that my life will also move on loads and so when I come back, if my friends lives are much the same, I will be different to them. What's more, will I have to start all over again in learning Japanese vocabulary?!

I also feel frustrated that, although my friends and family in Britain will certainly realise I have moved countries, I don't think they may realise exactly what changes I will go through. For one, I will be very tired - packing up home is a huge thing, so I am not starting from an energetic position, or even from zero again, rather I am starting from minus-5. I also feel like a foreigner going to Britain - I can't quite remember how everything works - like renting a house, starting a mobile phone contract. I also can't quite remember how a group of young British people coming together inter-relate (although I don't think this will be such a problem, as I do have British team-mates here.) Furthermore for over two years here I have called people back home when I've felt like it - due to the time difference and my skype calling method; usually when other people call me I don't have my computer on. So this has created a self-controlled communication culture. I can see myself losing that control pretty fast on returning home!

What's more I am living in quite a private culture here, where spending time on your own is normal. But when I want to see someone, usually they are available at only two hours notice! In contrast in Britain, I will be staying with other people for my first two months, have little privacy in that, be seen as weird if I want to spend time by myself going places possibly, and if I do want to see some folk, probably have to book with them a couple of weeks in advance!

I may also surprise people if i use some funny turns of phrase in English, or say some Japanese words by mistake (I am really scared I will make some stupid mistakes and be laughed at my family - because in japan you do use funny turns of phrase in a Japanese-English kind of way).

So that's how I'm feeling. It's different to a holiday - my life is turning around again.